be encouraged Christmas is still Special

To all of Fran’s friends especially in the FIAR community your love and awesome display of love and is over whelming. My heart for my wife still beats for her and longs for her; the sadness is real every day. But the gesture of love and comfort that you gave me is very special I knew that it would be but it goes beyond my expectations. Thank you all. I sent out the following to many of our friends and family because I wanted to share how good, gracious, and kind God is.


I thought that I would share this with all of you since everyone has been so great to my family this year. It is not to be taken lightly how we all impact each others lives. I in no way want to come across as proud or boastful my heart in sharing this is just to encourage you and remind you that God is good even in our deepest hurt and pain.

Today the verse in my devotional was II Cor. 1: 3-7 All praise to God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. God is our merciful Father and the source of all comfort. He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us. For the more we suffer for Christ, the more God will shower us with his comfort through Christ. Even when we are weighed down with troubles, it is for your comfort and salvation! For when we ourselves are comforted, we will certainly comfort you. Then you can patiently endure the same things we suffer. We are confident that as you share in our sufferings, you will also share in the comfort God gives us.

Fran was an active blogger and home school mom the following will tell her story and how she was loved as you read both of the links below from two of Fran’s friends. Emma and I read both of these before going to bed last night.

May your Christmas be blessed, to all of our friends.

Ed, Fran
Emma, Eden, E.J., Elliott, Eric


You may want to grab a Kleenex.

Marcy and I both have a blog post up if you'd like to read them sometime. Marcy's is here... http://www.benandme.net/2010/12/for-fran.html and mine is here... http://trainingheartsathome.blogspot.com/2010/12/delivering-frans-quilts.html.






FIAR Mom Chrity daughter Kelli, FIAR Mom Marcy, Emma and Ed

Into your hands...........

Well the angels in heaven rejoiced Wednesday morning at 9:35 AM as they ushered my sweet Fran into the presence of our LORD. What a day to meet Jesus it was the kind of morning we enjoyed many days, quite blue sky, with a slight breeze outside and with her family at her side.

I am to heart broken to have much to say right now. But I will say that out of the mouths of babes God speaks. Our sweet daughter Emma summed up the day as we shared our evening meal with out Fran by saying "this has been a great day!" My reply was "it has been a great day. Why was it a great day for you?" She smiled at me with the sweetest twinkle in her eyes. "Mommy went home to be with Jesus!" Oh for the confidence and peace of a child I pray that I can keep that today and tomorrow as the shell of who Fran was is laid to rest.

I am not sure if I can come back here and post on Fran's behalf. So for now I leave you with one request and prayer please follow this link to the last song we will play at our Celebration of Life for Fran Saturday at noon. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9n14NKh9phU I am blessed of God to have had the privilege of being her husband and twice blessed to be the father of our daughters Emma and Eden. Fran leaves a heritage in this world that will make a difference in Jesus name Amen and Amen.

Update for my dearest Fran

Well it is now June 14th and Fran's last post was My 16th. As many of you know who have followed Fran's blog she is very faithful to share her heart and lifes experiences through this medium. It has not been due to her lack of having something to say but more her ability to say what she wanted to say.

The facts are that she is not in any shape to post. The treatment plan she was on was not successful. The cancer found a way to mutate and continue on its rampage of her body. She is currently under Hosparus care and we are keeping her as pain free as possible.

It is with a heavy heart that I am posting for her at this time. We have tried to have her dictate what she wants to say but that has not been possible. A side effect of having liver failure from the cancer is having major fatigue making her sleep most of the day, and then the effects of the pain meds compound that more.

This is so hard for me to write about my best friend and wife. We have had a great life together with so much to be thankful for. The daughter we share is the highlight of our life together and is Fran's crowning achievement and gift to this world.

As Fran's time here with us comes to an end she is confident in the life that she is looking forward to which is hope in her eternal life to come. Her faith in her Saviour Jesus Christ has always been central to who she is but she has never forced her self on anyone but she has not kept her faith a secret either.

I will make one last post soon on her behalf, but for now know that she is at peace.

Chemotherapy....isn't it romantic?

See when it comes to cancer, you can never assume anything. The last time I posted I was on Day 13 with one day left of chemo pills. I was doing relatively well with high hopes for a great week off. Boy, I was wrong.

I took my last pills on Day 14 and went to bed that night. I awoke the next morning to a mouth full of sores and serious bathroom issues. Again trying to avoid grossing out my reading audience, I will just say that I spent about 5 days in my bathroom. No fun. About the time that began to resolve itself the bloating began. My abdomen began to swell and I became increasingly more uncomfortable.

I went to the doctor for my labs and to discuss this round of chemo. He said we would have to keep me at this dosage to remain effective. I'm not thrilled if this means my entire week "off" will be spent dealing with side effects. I plan to discuss this at my next visit. The more pressing matter is my ever expanding abdomen. I am now caring about 10 extra pounds of fluid. I can't do anything except stay flat on my back to relieve the pressure. It's pretty miserable.

I am scheduled to go in tomorrow morning to have the fluid drained from my abdomen. It is supposed to make me feel instantly better which is what I am hoping for since Ed and I are leaving for Maine on Wednesday. At first I was very nervous at the thought of them putting a needle in my abdomen to pull off this fluid, but as the days have progressed and I've grown larger by the day, I can't wait to get to the hospital in the morning.

I thankfully have a reprieve on the chemo since Ed and I are taking this mini vacation to Maine. I will be starting my pills again on Saturday the 22nd. Can you hear the excitement in my voice? What a great way to end a romantic get-away....chemotherapy. There's just nothing more romantic.

Day 13 of 14

I am now on day 13 of 14 days of chemo treatment. While this round has been gentler on my body for the most part, exhaustion has been my problem this cycle. My hands and feet just started getting red and feeling burned yesterday although the entire soles of my feet have been peeling off. Gross, I know. My throat is a bit raw and I've had the occasional nose bleed, but as a whole, it's been so much better.

I have found if I want to be productive at all I must do it before I take my morning dose of chemo pills. Within 1/2 hour of taking them I begin to feel nauseous and just need to sit down. Sleep is preferred at this point, but with children in the house it's usually not happening. It's ok though, I go to bed early and try to get caught up that way.

Eating is random at best. Most days nothing sounds appealing. Often if something does, I attempt it only to find out my mouth or digestive track doesn't agree. You can only eat so much ice cream before even that loses it's appeal. I'm looking forward to the coming week when my appetite will return and my body will cooperate.

I also had another Zometa treatment and Avastin treatment this week. They were pretty uneventful although something in the mix caused me to run a fever of 102 for a couple of days. Who knows...it's a wonder all this chemical mess doesn't cause more issues than it helps.

I will have another round or two of the chemo before they scan me for results. I don't have a sense one way or the other about how it's working. My liver isn't as sore, but I have more swollen lymph nodes in my neck then before. We'll see soon I guess.

Thanks to everyone for your continued love and support. I can't tell you how much it means. I'd love to write to you all with personal notes of thanks, but I just don't have the energy. Please take no offense to my lack of response. Life is harder on this end than I convey on this blog. Your prayers and support help keep me going. Thank you.

So I'm signing off at day 13 assuming that 14 will be uneventful. I'll get back to you soon as we move forward in this journey. For now I'm going to enjoy my upcoming week off hopefully not talking or thinking about cancer.